Wedding Vows 101: A guide to Promises of Forever

Wedding vows… do they leave you stumped? Your promise to your future spouse may be one of the most important things you will say. And if does not make this daunting, the prospect of having to say these words in public have you all but petrified. But with a little help, you can get a head start in writing your wedding vows. We’re here to help.

Here are some tips to help you write your vows:

–          Decide if both of you want to say your own vows. This may be deeply personal so you and your future spouse need to agree that saying your personalized vows is what both of you want. Your future spouse may prefer using the traditional vows, which are also beautiful. You also need to agree if you will have the same vow as a couple or if you want different vows for each of you.

–          Decide on your style. Would you like your vows to be romantic, funny, deeply personal or formal and traditional? Choose the style you are most comfortable in.

–          Decide on your vow’s content. The key elements in a wedding vow include: your promises about your marriage, a statement of love and something personal (but not too personal). Choose words that emphasize what you want to happen in your marriage: respect, fidelity, the promise of starting a family and your commitment to mutual happiness.

–          Avoid generalizations, be specific. Stay away from words such as, “I will forever love you.” It’s better to add personalized touches by sticking with simple, everyday ways you can show your love.

–          Choose your words carefully. Use strong action words such as “promise”, “cherish”, “honor”, “delight”, “prize”, “treasure” and so on. Carefully chosen words will add that “oomph” to your vows.

–          Short and sweet is the best way to go. Remember that a few carefully chosen words are more effective than a long-winded speech. So try to keep your vows to up to 3 minutes.

–          Consider the line: “How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.” Explore your feelings about your future spouse, your relationship and your marriage. Ask: what about your fiancé do you love most? What made you decide that he or she is “the one”?

–          Look at examples. Promises are for poets and lovers. So take a look at what poets have to say. There are volumes of Bible verses, poems, famous love lines and passages that you can look at and even quote in your vow. You can even choose to incorporate words from your love letters.

–          Listen to your vow. Now that you have written your vow, be sure to “test” it by reading it aloud with someone you trust. This will help you pick out areas for improvement. There may be some areas that don’t sound right so this is your chance to change it.

–          Write it down. You can try to memorize your vows but be sure to have a copy of it handy in case you blank out while you’re saying your vows.

–          Speak from your heart. This is perhaps the most important of all. Your words should be an outpouring of what you feel, know and believe about love and your relationship as man and wife. Don’t speak to impress other people watching – speak to your spouse.

Your vows tell your partner what you personally think and feel. The exchanging of vows is an important part of the marriage ceremony.

As you have given a lot of thought to your wedding vows, you should also give careful thought about other elements of your wedding. This includes the wedding ceremony, the wedding décor and your wedding location.

Your choice of wedding venue is an important aspect that will set the tone of the entire ceremony, including your exchanging of wedding vows. We at Western Gardens understand this and we offer you one of the best wedding locations in Sandy, Utah. The Atrium provides a beautiful backdrop as you recite your vows to each other.



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